We live in a country where the clothes we put on our backs are so prevalent, that we have an entire industry dedicated to it. This industry makes a pile of money every year off of our decisions. What should I wear? Does this make me look fat? Is this color good next to my face? Does that make me look fat? Shall I dress for fad or go for the sophisticated look? And, again, does this make me look fat?
Wives all cross this country buy more clothes every year while their husbands mourn the loss of closet space. And we’re not talking just clothes… we’re also talking shoes, handbags, scarves, hats, gloves, coats. And then there’s the jewelry!
The very fact that we can make a choice in garments is exceedingly heady to me when there are so many across the globe that have nothing. So, I decided to clean out my closet and give away a lot of clothes and accessories. I went into my closet and took a look. And holy cats! I have a lot of stuff! I don’t need anything new for the rest of my life! (Unless of course we move to a different climate and then all bets are off. I will need stuff!)
I weeded out dresses, slacks, jackets, and coats. I went through handbags and shoes. By the time I finished and had it in the back of my car for Good Will, I was thinking how liberated I felt. I had just given away maybe a good half of everything I owned. And this begs the question, what seriously makes me a well-dressed man or woman?
So here’s some thoughts and questions to ponder concerning well dressed people.
A mother and a daughter are walking through the parking lot of their church. Both are wearing beautiful matching dresses. Both have coordinated lovely handbags and shoes; and , most assuredly, they have spent a fortune on their hair. They are fighting. In public. The daughter has the potty mouth from Hades. The mother is screaming at the top of her lungs. Do you think they are still well dressed?
Here is another. A couple dressed in an Armani suit and tie and Christian Dior original with Jimmy Choo shoes arrive at a gala affair. They graciously greet other guests. Dinner is served and as they are seated, the man seats himself first while his wife has no one to seat her. He engages everyone at the table but his wife. She looks away from him all evening. When they leave, she gets her own coat and he leaves for the car. When he arrives with the car, he sits behind the wheel tapping his fingers and waits while his wife opens her own door and gets in. The minute they are in the car together, the fighting ensues. Are they well dressed?
One last example:
Three little girls walk into a birthday party together. Two are wearing beautiful party dresses, ankle socks with lace with black patten leather shoes. The other little girl is wearing a hand-me-down dress from her older sister that is a bit worn. She is not wearing lace socks and her shoes are the only pair she has. She is clean and her hair is combed back away from her face to reveal her pretty eyes. All three are smiling and greeting everyone. But they do not forget each other and the love that exists between them. Their eyes (especially the third little girl’s) light up with the affection they share and the grace they are giving to other guests in the room. Is one of them truly dressed better than the other?
Oh I’m not saying that being well groomed isn’t important. It is. But without good character and concern for others, I am wondering if the clothes can matter that much. I would have to say, to be well dressed, we start with SAP. S: a smile, A: Attitude (one that is positive and up-lifting), and P: Posture (Stand tall as if it’s a good thing to like you because you like yourself).
Annie told us in the musical “Annie” that we’re never fully dressed without a smile. I think she’s right. We can have on the most stunning outfit on the planet and if we look unhappy, it isn’t at all as pretty. Attitude. A positive attitude can do wonders even for jeans and a sweatshirt. It makes other people want to be around you! And Posture. Good posture makes for a great hanger when dressing our bodies. It also says, I am worth knowing and I’m ready for the day. Physically attractive women who slouch are not beautiful. SAP! If you’re a SAP, then you’re probably well dressed. That doesn’t sound very good, but in the last analysis I think it is the truth.
So as I toss (Hubby is LOVING THIS) at least half of my clothes, I am remembering that to smile, to have the attitude of grace and love,and to stand tall is where I start when I dress myself for the day. After that, it’s all an easy walk down hill. The best part of my outfit? I’m already wearing!
May you also be well dressed!
Best… Carolyn Thomas Temple