It may or may not be known that I am and have been a musician and performer all of me life. I began performing at the age of five. I still recall that first event in vivid detail. It was for a ladies’ luncheon at the Presbyterian Church in Rocky Ford, Colorado. My mother had me dressed to the nines. I was to sing “Here Comes Peter Cottontail.”
The room was loaded with women all talking at once. And then came the moment for me to sing; that same room began to get quiet. No one could see me half way back in this large hall, so it was suggested to have me stand on a chair while I sang. Someone lifted me onto the chair.
Now this was great for everyone else but for me it meant that I could now see all of them. And suddenly I was terrified! I recall my heart pounding in my chest and breathing sort of funny. I wondered how on earth I was going to remember those lyrics when all I could think of, were the many pairs of eyes all fastened to my person.
The pianist began the introduction… four measures to think of how to survive terror… Ideas were racing through my little head.
I reasoned that I didn’t have to be perfect. I just had to be adorable. And I came to that conclusion because someone in the audience during those four measures said, “Oh isn’t she just adorable.”
I latched onto that like it was my lifeline. And, once I had it in my head that perfection was unnecessary to be successful, the rest was easy. I finished the song and was given an A+ in “adorable,” and to this day, I have no idea whether I sang well or not! Yet the event was a success and I recall it that way.
Perfection is found in imperfection. For example, a leaf may be lovely in green but when it withers and dies, it suddenly has new dimensions of beauty in this lack of color and life. It has individuality in tones of reds or yellows or oranges or browns. Its shape is different. In fact all leaves become different in the way they wither and die and that diversity contains beauty.
And what about snow? New fallen snow is one white layer. But as it begins to melt, we see patches making designs, and some of it turning to ice that looks like a prism.
Then there is the greatest imperfection of all which is ourselves. Human beings are making mistakes every day of their lives, myself included. But it is not the ugliness of the mistake that matters, it is what we do about it that becomes beautiful.
Where are you going to look? At the ugly reality of death or the beauty of what comes after? At the mistake that led to pain or the change that leads to beauty?
My students make mistakes every time they come for their music lessons. Many have asked me how I can listen to this imperfection of notes, rhythm and time every afternoon. It’s easy. I don’t hear the mistake. I hear the possibility of growth and challenge of becoming better. THAT is beautiful! And again, it is not the mistakes that are made, it’s what you and I and they do about them.
I love life! It is amazing to me. It is ever changing and beautiful. Look up! Listen for the better part of life. And never stop trying to see what is beautiful and imperfect. To do any less is painful.
If God can forgive it, then why shouldn’t I? If He can see the better half then why shouldn’t I?
This month, I am planning to go to the mountains. I had hoped to go with a friend but if I have to go see the fall colors alone then so be it. While I will miss the presence of my friend, I can not miss the opportunity to see beauty in imperfect leaves. Leaves that have fallen to the ground and make that wonderful crunch under my feet. Leaves that once were young but now are old and ready to leave this life for fertilizer. They are beautiful, just like the mistakes my students make as they learn at their lessons.
Beauty is everywhere in imperfection. I therefore reason that imperfection itself holds beauty.
May your evening be filled with peace and love.
May the beauty of your life be evident to you.
Best… Carolyn Thomas Temple