Shoppers beware. Black Friday, the day that so many American Capitalists forge out into the night (yes, stores open at 3:00 a.m.) and buy buy buy! Last night I listened to friends discuss their plan of attack to this day of purchase that has no equal. As I listened, I could not understand why anyone would do this just to pay less money, when payment in loss of sleep, time away from family among a crowd of hungry buyers would be the robber, not the taxes added to the purchase.

The plan seemed without flaw. I cozied into the bed. I slept. I awoke. I had my tea, went to the computer to check my E-mail from friends and family. And this is where I learned that no one is safe of this day.

Inbox: Forty E-mails, none of which were from friends and family, dropped from the sky and into my personal space.
*Bloomingdales… 40% off blah blah blah, come see us today.
*Lucy Attire… 30% off blah blah blah buy buy buy, come see us today.
*Healthcare News… Healthcare you can afford (“How is that possible if I go to Lucy’s and Bloomingdales first,” I ask myself)
*Dell XPS laptop… buy buy buy, (“No no no.”)
*Coach Training Alliance… Year End Special… you too can go back to school. (Geeze, I took one “free” quiz and now they won’t leave me alone so, not a free quiz, is it.)
*JCPenny… Merry & get free shipping (“Huh?”)
*terry lusk… we ship world wide
*Dillards Dept. Store… Thanksgiving sale and values

I won’t bore you with the rest… And just as I was about to dump these pathetic cries for purchase into the delete file, MORE showed up! And then more and more. I heard from Dillards twice. And Bloomingdales? They wrote to me four times today… no, I take that back since another one just showed up.

Perhaps the plan here is to make my life so miserable at home, I’ll leave for the crowds to have no ads. But that wouldn’t be true, since I’d BE in that masteria and still receiving the ads in my absence.

And then, it may have occurred to you that I might look for that place in the ad which says, “Don’t send me this ever again.” I did look for that… found nothing but the vision of some hateful little man in a box making up these ads and saying, “Take that!”

All day they arrived in bundles of six to eighteen ads. And always I was lulled into the idea that it might be some friend sending me a lovely hello, but no. It was holiday greetings from The Loft, Ann Taylor Factory, Ann Taylor Outlet, (One would think I shopped frequently at Ann Taylor!) Princess Cruises (not a bad escape if it were cheaper!), Life Insurance Alert (Do I look like I’m dying? “Hmmm… how did she die?” Death from the craziness of ads!) Today was also the day for surveys. Would I like to take a survey? Dial this 800 number… “No thank you.” And oh this one is good… Four times sent to me with my name on it, ads for viagra!

“Enough with this,”I thought. I now have no holiday spirit, but life goes on. And I did have to put up a tree today. Bah, humbug! I drug out everything, made a mess everywhere, exhausted myself looking at lights and ornaments. I wanted a distraction. Just then I heard the little dog, who “delivers” my E-mail, and I thought, “Good, I’ll take a break.” It was no break. It was more ads all related to the condition of my prostate! I was not feeling too special. Clearly they do not know me, or these are serious idiots. I mean, the name Carolyn… Does that in any way sound like I might need help with my prostate? Oh yes, one other ad of interest… Am I ready to purchase my funeral plan? “No.”

I hauled myself back out to the tree, made several trips up and down the ladder adding ornaments to the tree, and reconsidered the ad for making my funeral arrangements since my back was now killing me.

Black Friday. How do we escape it? My rescue came in the form of a little girl from down the street.

“Hi Mr. Temple, I came to see Mrs. Temple. Can I come in?” Hubby to Julia, “Sure, she’s in the other room.”

Julia and I cut apples and parked ourselves in the middle of the tree mess. She told me about her day… Skating, lunch, playing with her brother, visiting with her friends. We, then, landed in the family room with Hubby and the three of us pulled out a video she liked called The Grinch, with Jim Cary. We drank cokes, ate pretzels, laughed at the film and snuggled up together.

A little girl with very long dark brown hair, big eyes full of wonder and magic, and smile to melt the polar caps beat down big Black Friday. This only goes to prove the adage, that it isn’t the size of the package, it’s the size of the heart that matters.

May you also have a Julia in your lives to warm your heart and kill the demons when they come to prey.

Best… Carolyn Thomas Temple